Green Eating

So you've seen the pictures of green goo that Mike and I have been ingesting, and you've been wondering what the hell are those two chunky monks doing? It really isn't as scary as it looks, I promise. Last week Mike and I watched "Fat, sick and nearly dead" and if you haven't heard of it you should go to your netflix queue or go here. And if you don't go there then I'll give you a really quick synopsis. Fat Australian comes to the states to go on a full on 61 day juice fast. He chose America cause he wouldn't have the distraction of everyone he knows or something. So he started by seeing a physician and getting a dirty bill of health. He then started this fast that like I said would last 61 days. It was some hardcore stuff! He drove across the country talking to people and showing them what he was doing. Part of the reason he started doing this was because of a condition he suffered from pretty much caused by bad diet. It's pretty uncommon so it was surprising when he ran into a truck driver who had the same condition. This dude was pushing 440lbs when he first appeared. Joe the guy who was doing his fast offered the dude his help but dude was like nah that's some crazy shit you're doing and I can't. So Joe finishes his 61 day fast and gets an amazingly better check up and goes home to Australia where he just keeps living a healthier life. Then one day he gets a message from the truck driver who decided he needed Joe's help. So Joe goes back to get the truck driver started and they keep in touch by phone and stuff but the truck driver keeps at it. He even tries to get his brother on the bandwagon. While Joe's story was crazy cool it was the truck driver who really struck a cord for Mike and me but especially Mike. Like holy fuck, if this guy who is over 100lbs heavier than Mike and 2x as heavy as me can do it than why can't we? The guy literally lost like 100lbs and went from being able to walk for 5 minutes to this dude who was in the best shape of his life and was running! Running!!

So Mike and I went out and got a juicer and then we went to the farmers market and bought a ton of veggies. I came home and emptied the fridge, which honestly needed it anyway. It had stuff in there that probably could have killed us if not severely maimed us. Once it was all done, cleaned out and everything replaced with a healthier alternative it was awesome to stand back and look inside of it. It was so colorful and organized and healthy! It was like we were watching the Cribs episode for someone who wasn’t either of us. I was still a bit or a lot skeptical of this idea of making juice from veggies. To me veggies have always been something to be eaten slathered in ranch or if cooked then coated in melted butter. But putting them through a juicer and drinking the odd colored extracts? Yeah not something that had ever come to mind!
While I was busy doing some stuff, Mike got to work. I could hear the machine going wild downstairs. I was afraid. I was even more worried when I saw him emerge at the stair case. Huffing and puffing, sweating and holding three ominous looking glasses of what can only be described as GREEN. I sat there considering it and preferring to entertain myself with the task at hand instead of jumping in and getting my taste buds wet with this pond water.
At Mike’s insistence I finally did it. I took a frightened sip from my glass and was pleasantly surprised by the flavor. There was the zest of the lemon, the mild background spice of the ginger, and the refreshing cucumber. You can vaguely taste some of the celery; and the kale, well that just blended right in. Because it’s being juiced and not blended you don’t have that sludge consistency but really just a juice. I drank all of it and was glad that for once I hadn’t fought Mike tooth and nail to avoid eating or drinking something.
So our plan is to ease our way into this fast. We’re replacing a meal a day with the juice and when we get back from California and subsequently Meatgasm 2011 then and only then will we begin our fast. Neither of these is a last hurrah meal, just plans that have been in place prior to this fast thing came about. Meatgasm 2011 is the trip to Seattle we’ve had planned for a few weeks now. We’ve all been Jonesing for some Brazilian BBQ for a long while. It’s not cheap, but what says love more than a bunch of scantily clad men feeding you endless amounts of meat? As far as my trip to Cali… well that without a doubt means good food. And lots of it.
For those of you who are wondering if we will be doing more harm than good, fear not! Mike is seeing our doctor today to run this by him before we go all buck wild on the beetus train to hell. We are still getting a good amount of fiber, maybe more so than we would with our typical diet of red meat and carbs. The bad kind of carbs that is. We have been working on eating smarter and fresher but you know when the urge sets in and you just want a greasy burger. Sometimes it is too much to resist. As far as a serious spike in sugar is concerned; we are using very little fruit. Like I mentioned, our fridge is currently holding things like celery, cucumbers, kale, dandelion greens, spinach, broccoli, carrots and lemons. While some fruit does go into the construction of the juice, I am keeping track. We have a scale which also gives out nutritional readings for the foods weighed on them so it makes it easy to keep track of the carbs going into each mix. So long as I’m keeping my pump apprised of the amounts I will be ok. I have been careful to continue checking my blood sugars to avoid spikes or serious lows and so far so good. Of course as mentioned, Mike is talking to our M.D about this and if he says it’s a no go then that’s the end of it. We don’t want to jeopardize our health; on the contrary we are hoping to do more good to our body. Clean out all the years of toxins and start clean.
So there you have it. These are the shenanigans the Jones’ are up to this week.